How to Use Humour to Attract Women
March 7, 2011
This is my latest article on Amped Asia. You can check out my article on “How to Use Humor to Attract Women” here.
I’ve reproduced it below for your convenience. If the jpegs are too small, click on them, and that will enlarge them for you in a new browser.
As always, comments are welcome!
Question from Matthew: “Everyone knows that humor is a big attraction tool. How does someone who’s not very funny, or is perhaps soft-spoken, develop a good ability with humor?”
Hey Matthew,
You are totally correct that humor is a big attraction tool.
If you can’t even make a girl laugh, there’s very little chance you’ll be able to attract her. If you CAN make her laugh, you’ve got a good sign she’s at least comfortable with you and may accept your advances.
Lack of humor is a problem endemic to Confucianized cultures, including East Asian societies. We’re taught to think logically, to be conformists, and to be obedient to our parents and elders. Our Confucianized parents raised us to be good mathematicians, engineers, and classical pianists. We aren’t using to living in the mental world of the ridiculous or doing and saying outrageously bizarre things.
But just like any other skill, being comedic and conveying humor are things you can learn, practice, and master. I’ll give you three quick tips any Asian brothers or sisters can use to channel their inner Russell Peters.
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1. EXAGGERATE TO ABSURDITY
Dialogue 3
You (as a guy approaching the most hottest women in the bar or club): “Hey look, I know you guys are soo terribly unattractive that no guys would ever hit on you… So, I thought I’d do you a favor and make you look good… You guys are my good deed for the week (sly smile).”
Don’t do this on average-looking girls or on women lacking self-esteem. This is reserved for women who are beautiful and know they’re beautiful. They will get the joke 
Check out Russell Brand for exemplary cases of the “Exaggerate to Absurdity” strategy, especially his interview with Nerina Pallot. For the Russell Brand Nerina Pallot interview, click here.
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2. POSITIVE MISINTERPRETATION
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3. GET YOUR FRIENDS LAUGHING FIRST (AND GET READY TO LAUGH AT YOURSELF)
The Power of Attention in Controlling Attraction: Californication as Case Study
March 3, 2011
One of my favorite TV shows, Californication, is also beloved by many aspiring social artists. But many dating coaches fail to see the social arts (of the script writers and Duchovny playing the character) in the movie. The guy who put together this video clip does a great job of pointing a lot of what’s going on. Great job, NelTY PUA!
The Aura Dating Academy guys should appreciate this, as we just completed a fun 2-hour class that covered how to control attention–yours and hers–so as to control the conversational flow and power in the interaction. Withdrawing attention and making people earn it is an effective push-pull technique. Hank Moody does it masterfully here. He’s also exemplary with the cocky-funny.
How to be Politely Assertive: Trudeau and Cruise
February 19, 2011
A common question I get from Singaporean clients is how they can be assertive without being assholes. It’s as if they never had any role-models to show them how to be assertive in a civil manner.
They’ve only seen the two extremes of (1) being a passive, pushover who gets taken advantage of and shoved around, or (2) of being an arrogant asshole (usually getting his courage from being inebriated) pushing people around and a public nuisance.
They ask me what they should do when another guy cuts ahead of them in the queue. The only two options they can think of are (1) muttering under their breath, letting the resentment build up (often taking it out on others later or when they’ve got enough liquid courage) but getting taking advantage of, or (2) starting a shouting match and fist fight.
I’ve seen this as the norm in Confucianized countries like Taiwan, Korea, and sometimes in mainland China. This is a major reason why there are so many fights in nightclubs by drunken Asian dudes. They don’t have any “game” or even social intelligence and just keep all that resentment from being pushed around silently building up inside them until it explodes in out-of-control violence.
Well, there’s another way: Polite Assertiveness. Heck, why not first try to undercut your assertiveness with smiles and gentle reasoning to defuse the situation even further.
A key affirmation of every powerful man is: I do not tolerate disrespect of myself, time, or property. For most men, I would also add family and loved ones to that list.
So it’s important that you know how to assert yourself properly when you encounter disrespect.
The following are two exemplars to give you an idea of how this is done.
1. The first is Pierre Trudeau, Prime Minister of Canada from 1968-79, 1980-84. In this clip, he’s handling very rude questions from a very hostile reporter about his decision to invoke the War Measures Act, which gave the government sweeping powers of arrest and detention without trial, in the face of the kidnappings of two public officials by domestic terrorists (known as the October Crisis).
Notice how Trudeau starts with good-natured responses and plenty of smiling, like a granddad explaining to his grandson how the big bad world works. He never loses his cool, even all the way to the end with his famous, “Just watch me.”
Btw, Trudeau was very good with the ladies and makes for an awesome all-around high-value role-model.
2. The next example is a Neil Strauss favorite, Tom Cruise, “the alpha male of alpha males.” Here he firmly but patiently deals with a rude journalist who squirts water in his face. Notice his initial reaction is to laugh it off and just chat with the guy. He also turns away the attempts of the staff to protect him and even wipes his own face. Notice, too, how he gently holds down the reporter’s hand. Cruise is reportedly a very physical expressive guy. He is calm enough at the end to smile and direct his comments at the people nearby.
Both men show plenty of self-control under the circumstances.
Play on,
David
Top 5 New Year’s Resolutions to Jumpstart Your Dating Life
January 11, 2011
From now on, any articles geared more to the Singapore context will be posted on the Aura blog with a notice on asianrake.com, just like this one 
Check this article out here: Singapore Dating Academy’s Top 5 New Year’s Resolutions to Jumpstart Your Dating Life.
Happy new year!!!
How to Practice Approaching Even in Close Knit Social Circles
December 11, 2010
Just published another Amped Asia article. Lance and his team are doing some valuable work over there for the cause of Asian minorities, especially Asian guys, so I’m more than happy to help out.
My latest article deals with what you can do to practice your skills in approaching and attracting women, even when you’re operating in tight-knit social circles where everybody seems to know everybody else… which is the case in Singapore.
I was shocked at how I’d meet new people a couple of years after I had moved here, and then I’d find out later that we already had 75 Facebook friends in common. You’d never find that level of inter-connectedness in North America. 20 mutual friends that you didn’t know about, yes. But 75? In one case, there was even a guy I had just met after 2 years living here with whom I already had 101 mutual friends.
So here are my 3 quick tips. Check them out here: How to Practice Approaching Even in Close Knit Social Circles.
How to be Social: Use the Litmus Test Opener (Singapore Dating Tips, Ep. #1)
November 22, 2010
Hey guys,
So here’s another videoblog I did, this time on an easy, but often overlooked, type of opener, the Litmus Test Opener. This kind of opener is not only great for helping you avoid getting waved away by socially immature people, they’re also a great way of warming up socially and practicing how to be social.
We welcome any feedback at all about how we can better serve you, so do write to us: admin “at” asianrake.com
Play on,
Asian Rake David
Think You’re Too Shy to Meet Women? Then You Need SHY GUY GAME and CHILL VIBE
November 11, 2010
Think You’re Too Shy to Meet New Women? Then You Need SHY GUY GAME
If you want to meet and date amazing women in Singapore, you do NOT have to be loud, brash, or the stereotypical “party guy.”
Many men in Singapore have strange notions of how a “cool guy” or a “guy who gets women” behaves and looks.
They think he’s smiling and leaning into the girl, like the classic (awful) pose with her leaning her back against the wall and him with his arm fully extended, pushing against the wall while leaning in facing her.
Or worse (and a rookie-mistake), he thinks the “cool guy” is loud, laughing, and moving his arms and hands around in big and rapid gestures.
Or worse still, that he’s dancing all out and putting on a show, or dancing with all the girls. Like some horrible Asian parody of Vince Vaughan in the Wedding Crashers.
There is a time and place for Loud Guy Game or “flash game” or “frat boy game.” And it is a useful skill to call on when necessary.
But more often than not, the loud, laughing, gesticulating guy is a dancing monkey, a try-hard, a tool. As sad as it is, most wannabe-PUAs in Singapore try to act like this.
To meet, attract, and date beautiful women, you do NOT need to “own the room,” or have everyone listening to you or talking to you, or have ten women around you in the club.
That’s intermediate level. It’s “flash game.” It might be impressive to look at, but it doesn’t say anything about whether you’re actually closing the deal. Read more
FREE Seats for Social Arts Mastery Program in Singapore
September 18, 2010
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Dear Friend,
- Have you ever seen your ideal woman walk by in the café or shopping mall, but you had no idea how to even approach her, so you watched her disappear from your life forever?
- Are you ever insecure that you’re not tall, handsome, rich, or cool enough for attractive women to be interested in you?
- Do you ever get so nervous at the mere thought of approaching a beautiful girl that you’ve experienced any of these symptoms: your heart starts racing, your palms get sweaty, your breathing becomes constricted, your mind goes totally blank, and your feet feel like lead?
- Are you ever self-conscious and anxious around beautiful women to the point where you can’t relax or communicate naturally?
- Have you studied a lot of dating advice and resources written in the US or UK, but you haven’t been able to get those methods and strategies to work in the Singaporean context?
- Have you ever been frustrated that you can’t get your dating life together, but you’re too ashamed to admit to your friends that you need help?
- Do you ever feel like you just don’t understand women when it comes to their interests in shopping, fashion, etc, and just don’t know how to relate to them?
- Have you spent a lot of money on luxury cars, fancy dinners, and even precious jewelry just to get girls, and then wondered why women still give you the dreaded “Let’s Just Be Friends” speech at the end of the night?
- Have you been spending $1000 a night on bottles and club tables hoping to impress the ladies but still find yourself home alone at the end of the night?
- Or have you been looking for that ONE truly exceptional woman who can be your soul-mate, who just “gets you” on every level—emotionally, intellectually, and sexually—but you’ve given up hope that you’ll ever find a woman like this, or that if you do, you wouldn’t be completely confident you could attract her?
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Join us for just one weekend, and we will transform your dating and love life forever.
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The original lifestyle coach and dating consultant whom the Asian media has dubbed, Asia’s “Hitch”—aka., Singapore’s Dr. Date (Asian Rake David)—is offering a special charity event to support One Singapore and their beneficiary, Little Sister’s Fund, on December 3-5, 2010.
Make no mistake. This is THE REAL DEAL.
Remember, all of this comes with a full, 100% money-back guarantee. If you are at all unsatisfied with the program, you get all your money back. There is absolutely no risk to you. That’s because I am completely confident that this program will help you tremendously in mastering your dating and social life.
Or, click on the Social Arts Mastery event page.
You can also always write to us at: admin “at” asianrake.com
“Singles in Singapore”: Live TV Appearance on Dating in Singapore
September 4, 2010
I was invited as the “dating expert” by Channel NewsAsia (the premier news channel in the region) and their online presence, BlogTV, to be on a panel on live TV. The topic was the Singapore government’s recent call for proposals to increase dating among Singapore singles, which is part of their broader dating campaign and attempt to raise marriage and birth rates among the higher socio-economic status (SES) groups in the country.
It was a lot of fun, and the extra adrenaline rush from doing a LIVE TV show was exciting. The hosts were excellent at keeping everyone engaged, and the producers were very professional. The set was also huge, much bigger than it looks on the screen, as it was housed in a cavernous warehouse. The show aired from 8:15-9:15PM on BlogTV, and Channel NewsAsia picked it up from 8:30-9PM live on prime time television.
Here are a few clips. They’re from the online version, which was filmed using a different set of cameras from the Channel NewsAsia TV show, so it’s mainly static, with very little zooming, unlike the TV show. Thanks are due to LL for editing and uploading.
Cheers, David.
Top 5 Tips for Singaporean Men Who Want to Attract Beautiful Women
August 22, 2010
The premier news channel in Singapore, Channel News Asia, asked me to put together a list of the top five tips for Singaporean men who want to attract beautiful Singaporean women. You can find my article here!
Unfortunately, it seems the formatting was all lost in the conversion, so all the bold text is gone, but I’m sure you can figure it out. Check it out here for yourself!
Would love to hear your thoughts. You can contact me at: david@asianrake.com
Cheers!
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