Sheiryn Aisiqa and Lifestyle Travel Tips
January 16, 2012
This post is about my relationship with my girlfriend and a few great travel tips we’ve come up with from our travels around the world.
Note: If you like personal posts like this, make sure you check out our facebook fan page, where I post much more frequently: www.facebook.com/auradating
Maybe some of you hadn’t picked up on this, and though we were as subtle about this as we could be, I’m still surprised that so many people hadn’t clued in yet. So just in case it’s not crystal clear, I want to make it more than obvious that I’ve been in an exclusive, committed relationship with my girlfriend, Sheiryn Aisiqa, since late 2009, and we’d been dating since we met on my first week in Singapore in 2008.
Sheiryn is a Singaporean model and image consultant of mixed racial ancestry. She’s also Asia’s top female dating coach and has been coaching since 2008, longer than any other infield dating coach in Singapore.
That I have a girlfriend might come as shock to those superficial readers who can’t even take the trouble to do a bit of basic reading before contacting me with a long list of dating questions, even though I’ve mentioned this fact in countless media interviews, on my FAQ, on my bio on this blog, in the Aura Dating website bio, and Sheiryn even mentions this in her own online web presence. Recently, CLEO magazine even did a photoshoot and feature interview on us as a couple in their Valentine’s Day issue! So read up first before contacting me!
Some of these superficial readers (mostly hailing from one of the judgmental, moralistic, backward and conservative Asian sub-cultures–I won’t name names here but you probably know who you are) just assume that I live a lifestyle of one-night stands, threesomes, orgies, boozing, snorting coke off a stripper’s butt, and lord knows what other sinful activity. While at some point in the past 8 years, I’m sure I’ve done some of those things they’re accusing me of, it’s a fact that I am not now–to borrow a term from one misguided reader–living a a “loose” lifestyle.
On one count, though, these critics have something correct–the life of a player, pick up artist, or playboy is often very selfish and self-centered. They’re right to look askance at such lifestyles.
What I now seek most is fulfillment through making the world a better place for other people, enriching the lives of others, and just plain doing good in the world.
Many of my clients, approach coaches, and advanced Aura members are still seeing, dating, juggling multiple women and meeting more every week. But I grew out of my “sowing the wild oats” phase after over four full years of “being intimate” (yes, that’s a euphemism) with hundreds of women and inadvertently getting myself into the craziest of predicaments.
While I don’t encourage it, I do understand why men often (often but not always) need to go through such a stage of “sowing their wild oats” or burning off this layer of karma, as it’s something I had to go through in order to be happy now and to be who I am today. Unlike 97% of the men in this world, I’ll never wonder whether the grass is greener on the other side or wonder “what if,” because I’ve already been there and done that. And in the course of my journey, I’ve developed considerable skills, understanding, and experience in social intelligence and social dynamics to enable me to more fully enjoy what I do have now.
Since late 2009, I’ve chosen to focus my attention on one wonderful woman–who gives me all the love, romance, and sexual fulfillment I seek–and channel my excess testosterone-driven energies into more productive pursuits (I’m planning to follow up with a post for the more advanced audience, which expands on philosophy from Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich, as well as many other sources), such as growing this company and my other investments and doing more good in the world through charity work and just plain trying to make the world a better place.
In fact, drawing on the extensive and cutting-edge research of Professor John Gottman and others (more below), a major focus in the Mastery level curriculum of Aura Dating Academy is How to Succeed in Long-Term Relationships, whether these relationships are open or exclusive. I am able to teach from my relatively extensive personal experience, having been married, divorced, juggling several girlfriends at once, and now happily committed to a wonderful woman.
One thing that sets apart Aura Dating Academy from pick up artist companies or PUA schools is our emphasis on happiness, fulfillment, and building lasting relationships, which is why I’ve been spending the past few years studying the mountains of research on couple’s psychology, counseling, and therapy. In his famous book, Blink, Malcolm Gladwell tells the story of John Gottman, who can predict with 95% accuracy, after observing an hour of a couple talking, whether that couple will still be married fifteen years later. After just fifteen minutes of observation his accuracy is still at 90%. Attempts by marital therapists, graduate students in psychology, newlyweds and recently divorced faired no better than chance to predict the outcome based on the videotapes of couples. There were just so many things going on in the conversations, and so much to digest, absorb, and process, that the patterns were difficult to discern. The point is that Gottman has found the very few select “indicators” that predict performance. And yes, we at Aura Dating Academy teach these and much more in our core curriculum.
This emphasis on successful long-term relationships has grown, like all my passions and interests, out of the trajectory of my personal life. In this case, I’m fortunate to have as my partner, Sheiryn.
Recently, we were featured in CLEO magazine in an article about how opposites attract, something I totally believe in. For most people, opposites don’t attract because most people prefer what’s comfortable and rarely challenge themselves on a regular basis to step outside their comfort zone and learn new things. However, for people who want to continually mature and grow, opposites do attract if they are complementary opposites. In other words, they see in the other person the traits, knowledge, or experience they lack and wish to learn or develop in themselves.
Some excerpts:
“We complement each other. She keeps me young, and I bring her more mature perspectives. When you are comfortable in a relationship, you tend to think your partner accepts you for everything, but she continually challenges me, and in turn I want to become a better person for her.
“As a dating coach, I work with people with a checklist, but when they meet someone who meets the requirements, there’s no chemistry. Love and attraction is all about feelings, and you can’t use logic to persuade yourself into a relationship.”
Every time I do some press, there are factual inaccuracies in the coverage. This is no different:
Sheiryn is a secondary school graduate (not “dropout”). I had been separated for 3 years when I met her (not “just ended his marriage”). And Sheiryn had several dating relationships before me (though I am the first guy to whom she has been exclusive). Still, it was a fun interview and photoshoot! And I love how they imply I’m Prince Charming 
One thing we DO have in common is our love of travel.
Together, we’ve traveled the world and have even more exciting plans this year. A sampling of our travel over the past year:
Private hot springs (onsen) at Kinnotake ryokan in the mountains of Japan:
The Taj Mahal:
Stunning Wildflower Hall in the Himalayas in India.
The green tea hills of Dragons’ Well (Longjing) in Hangzhou, China, where the world famous Longjing tea is harvested every spring:
On the West Lake (Xihu) in Hangzhou sipping on a bastion of globalization:
Clubbing in Shanghai:
Our private villa in Bali with two swimming pools:
Sunset at Kudeta in Bali:
At the Sydney Opera House:
Driving with the top down on the Pacific Coast Highway between LA and San Diego:
Priority tickets for the X-Factor show in LA. We were seated in the third row from the stage, right next to Simon Cowell, Nicole Scherzinger, Paula Abdul, and LA Reid. Here’s us standing at our seats after the taping:
One of the four cars we rented while on that trip in California.
We also spent four days in Vegas toward the end of that trip. Rode in limos there much of the time 
In December, I flew to Orlando, USA, for a 5-day family reunion at the amazingly huge Disney World before flying back up to Toronto, Canada to spend Christmas with family. Here’s the impressive lightshow at one of the several Disney World theme parks there:
Both ways, I got upgraded to first class on the flight to and from Toronto!
As you can see, travel is one of our shared passions.
In my many years experience traveling frequently for my Ph.D. research and work, as well as on travel related to my dating consulting, I’ve picked up a few tips that could help people, especially Singaporeans get more out of their travel experiences.
SINGAPOREANS AND TRAVEL
I notice that while Singaporeans love to travel around Southeast Asia, they often take budget carriers. I used to do this a lot when I first moved to Singapore. But then I started flying with them to go farther, including China, Australia, and India. That’s when I noticed I was accumulating fewer miles on my Star Alliance reward program. Since then, I only use budget airlines for regional flights (within Southeast Asia), unless it’s on one of their super saver sales with flights for 5 cents. Star Alliance is the world’s first and largest airline alliance.
AIR
While a national carrier or luxury airline (like Singapore Airlines or Thai Airways) will usually cost more than a budget carrier (like Air Asia, Tiger, or Jetstar), if you’re flying more than 35,000 miles a year, the perks are definitely worth it. And if you’re flying 50,000 miles, you’re eligible for Star Alliance Gold benefits. And sometimes, like when I recently looked up flights to Angkor Wat in Cambodia, the budget airlines can be more expensive.
Since 2005, I’ve been an Air Canada Elite and Star Alliance Gold member and have really enjoyed all the perks, including free upgrades; priority standing for upgrades (especially when flying with a North American carrier); airport business class or first class lounge access; priority seat selection; checking in three bags of luggage free with extra weight allowance for each bag; and priority check-in, baggage handling, and boarding. While Air Canada has the best loyalty plan, imho, Thai Airways is also not bad. You don’t have to live in the country to sign up for that country’s airline’s loyalty plan.
If you’re spending a lot of time in US airports, then maybe lounge access is not a big deal since the airport lounges there all suck. But the lounges in Asia are wonderful. The United Red Carpet Lounge in Hong Kong always has several different opened bottles of red and white wine, a full bar of spirits, and a few different beers on tap, including sometimes Guinness. They also have a dim sum buffet, a small dessert bar, as well as a full meal buffet. The ANA lounge in Tokyo has a chef making fresh ramen noodle soup to order, in addition to a sushi bar. And it’s all complimentary.
And you can count miles on any airline in the Star Alliance. Here’s a list of member airlines, including Singapore Airlines, Thai Airways, ANA in Japan, Asiana Airlines in Korea, Air China, Air Canada, Lufthansa, United, Continental, and US Airways.
If you have Gold standing with Star Alliance, all you have to do is call up Oneworld (which includes Cathay Pacific), and they’ll give you reciprocal standing and privileges to entice you to switch over.
If you do two round-trip flights to North America per year, you’re 80% of the way to Star Alliance Gold. So all expats should definitely be on a flight reward program. Trust me. It’s worth it.
HOTEL
Also, if you enjoy staying in hotels, you should definitely get on hotel reward plans. I know 95%+ of single Singaporean men in Singapore will live with mom and dad until they get married or turn 35. And I’m assuming they’re not doing it in public. So it seems Singaporean men are keeping domestic, low-end hotels in business. However, if you’re avoiding the Hotel 81’s and Fragrance Hotels (as you should), then you should definitely be counting your hotel stays toward membership standing.
Since 2008, I’ve also been a Gold Preferred Guest of the Starwood Hotels. I’m now also an elite member with several hotel chains, including the Fairmont Hotels, Hyatt Hotels, and Priority Club Rewards. I like Starwood’s selection of hotel brands the best, as they are well represented in Asia at a wide variety of price points: Le Meridien, Westin, The Luxury Collection, Sheraton, Four Points by Sheraton, St. Regis, and the W Hotels, which we enjoyed most recently in LA.
When getting elite status with a hotel alliance, you should focus on getting it with an alliance that has both lower end and higher end options. The Fairmont and Hyatt hotels don’t have low end versions, although they usually only require 5 stays a year, whereas the others require 10+ stays. The Starwood Hotels has the Four Points by Sheraton brand and the Priority Club Rewards has the Holiday Inn Express brand, for example, for when you want to just get a good night’s sleep and aren’t too picky about the rest of the facilities.
The perks I enjoy the most are the automatic room upgrade, the dedicated Starwood Preferred floors, and late check-out. Often, I also get Club Lounge access. You can read more about the Starwood Gold benefits here. You only need 10 stays or 25 nights a year to get these perks.
RENT A CAR
Also new to many Asians is that places are very spread out in North America and Australia, with Manhattan being the only exception I can think of.
Hence, when you’re visiting those countries for more than a couple days, always rent a car. If you return it to the same place you picked it up, it can be very cheap, like less than a $100 a week. And it’s a lot more fun!
TRAVEL INDEPENDENTLY
One last note. I know a lot of Asians are scared of stepping outside their comfort zone and exploring new places on their own, hence, the prevalence of those big and loud Chinese tour groups.
My recommendation is to avoid tour groups, especially in Asia, like the plague. Get a good travel guide. Use tripadvisor. Ask people who’ve been there. Book ahead. And plan and travel on your own.
A great travel blog with useful tips on how to make the most out of your loyalty plans is the Frugal Travel Guy. Check it often.
Bon Voyage!
Until next time,
David
Related Posts
Comments
15 Responses to “Sheiryn Aisiqa and Lifestyle Travel Tips”
Got something to say?
|
|
-
__________________________
Dahum, you guys sure do travel in style! Love the round the world pics!
Good luck to the both of you!
That was fast, haha. Thanks for the feedback
Nice post and pics David,
All the best to you two
Thanks, Aaron!
Happy new year to you!
An awesome read! Keep them coming!
Really cool, AR! Jealous of all your travels. Sheiryn is gorgeous. Good travel tips, but I’m guessing they’re more applicable to older guys who aren’t still on student budgets.
Jing Cheng,
Glad you like it. Will do!
Daryl,
Thanks, man. Well, as a grad student, I traveled back and forth from China to Canada twice a year and got my Star Alliance Gold status mainly from that. But the hotel Preferred Gold Status wasn’t practical until I grew out of budget hotels and hostels and was traveling with special company.
Great to see you two guys doing so well and in-love. I wish there were more PUA like you…
-Nils
aka Dr. Love
Awesome post! There is nothing like traveling! You meet so much interesting people, eat some of the most delicious foods and have stories to remember for a lifetime.
Kudos for showing us what is possible!
Best,
Wil R
Hey Nils,
Thanks for your kind words.
But by the way, in case you missed the main point of this article, I AM NO LONGER A PICK UP ARTIST!
Hey Wil,
Great to hear from you. And yes, traveling can be a great way of increasing overall happiness.
Best, David
I am embarassed to say, your girlfriend is very sexy.
Thanks for the great tips David! I love travelling so I had signed up for Singapore Airlines Krisflyer membership. Didn’t really take notice on the hotel rewards part until you pointed that out. Shall give it a try heh!
Keep those articles coming my man!
Yours sincerely,
Terence
Hey Terence,
That’s great to hear! Krisflyer is one of the most difficult of the Star Alliance loyalty programs to accumulate airmiles. But they give extraordinary service.
Will def be churning out more articles this year
Hey David,
Awesome tips, from an awesome article! I was reading the section “About David”, and was wondering how you managed to stand up to your conservative Christian family’s beliefs, as it was clearly something that held you back .
Thanks man!
Hey Josh,
Thanks!
And great question, though I’m not sure how to answer that, as I’m a philosophical type of guy who tries to let one’s rational conclusions dictate how one should live one’s life. At a certain point, my rational thinking led me to question certain beliefs I once held, which no longer seemed tenable. After years of probing and asking the world’s experts in these fields about them and not getting any reasonable answers, and then realizing that likely no good answers were forthcoming, I slowly changed my fundamentalist views.